Essence of time by weirdlykagome

Essence of time

Disclaimer: Inuyasha and its characters will never belong to me, no matter how much I want them to. TT

Whelp jokes aside, 

I would strongly advise y'all to read the prequel 'the song of souls'. This one would feel disconnected otherwise. 

~Enjoy.

My mind was always stuck in the past nowadays. It has been almost a year since Sesshomaru has finally left the planes of existence. Those last moments would be etched in my soul for eternity. Tokyo University was a magnificent structure, a capable architecture of its glory. But it lacked all the materials I needed for my research. My promise to him had already become my bane of existence.

An excavation site had opened up recently, calling out to all the archaeologists worth their salt to come and discover the grandeur of history, which they craved and loved. I was no exception to that rule. I had tagged along with my professors as they had led a huge crowd of students to the site. 

I tried to drag myself back to the time when everything in my life was crystal perfect; family, friends, Inuyasha. I was probably the happiest during those times. But I still wonder when those times and feelings had changed. I remember a phrase my grandfather always used to tell me, 'life is not all roses', I always wondered what that meant, until I understood the significance of the phrase years later when I came across a history lesson of pain and loss. 

The history class was only a term-long and the curriculum was fashioned in a way to help struggling student pass. I was struggling with school then, jumping between eras and saving the world never really left a girl enough time to catch up to her studies. Therefore, I took the class, I had hoped sometime only after weeks later of slotting into the class that I had forgone my curiosity on non-existent demonic history. But, it was already too late. The professor had already reached a small chapter on the Inu-lord of the west.

I had felt extremely apprehensive when the professor had skimmed on that small chapter of a thick 3000 pages book. His footprints in history were so small, so inconsequential that my heart had ached. How can such a massive and important entity get reduced to such a pathetic existence of mere yellowing-dry-pages? That was the first time I had felt so much pain and longing that my soul had wanted to reach out of my body and cross those pages; with the foolish hopes of saving him from his untimely, dastardly demise. Inuyasha was the love of my life, remained so, but when I had skimmed my shaky fingers over the black prints of his last moments...

'The Inu-Lord died protecting a man in red blood' 

I had never felt so much repulsion for the white-haired, half-breed best friend of mine. Maybe the hope of meeting an alive and kicking Sesshomaru in my time had convoluted my thoughts and feelings that I had felt the worst towards my best friend. I had always known that Inuyasha would never have lived this long, but Sesshomaru would have; as a result, I had almost tethered myself to that hope. That is why when his sacrifice to save my best friend came to my notice, I had felt like destiny had slapped me in my face once again, denied me of my happiness, my due of fate! 

------------------------------------------

The bus stopped and we formed a sort of line formation to enter the excavation site. It truly reminded me of my childhood days when the elementary schools had devised ways to keep their population of school-kids in check. 

The excavation site was huge, circled by the official security strip lines of Tokyo University department of history and myths. The site was in rumbles but a very small semblance of the previous magnificent Shiro had remained. 

The professor turned to us and handed us out the site permits, explaining in a deep and attention-demanding tone, "No one leaves without a partner. The permits have the groups written on them, turn them over and find your group. Do not leave the group and remember to record all the important findings. Above all, enjoy, this is your first step into the real world of lost-era hunters!" he finished with a bright smile. 

All of us grouped in pairs entered the rumbles, balancing on the jagged rocks and bricks. I tried to keep my eyes opened to my surrounding. This site had called me as his energy had a year ago. Rumbles and more rumbles with a fountain of dust and rock-chips were my only find as of yet. The Shiro must have been magnificent only if the architecture peeking in between the rumbles were any clue. Besides, he would not have settled for anything less.

I was about to enter a dark, deep rumble cave when my partner suddenly shouted at the top of his lungs, "What the hell, why do have the uniform of Tokyo high school in here? Is someone playing a prank of us? Who altered the s...mmmphh....mmmphh" 

I lunged and clamped my hands over his mouth, keeping him from shouting anymore than he was required to. Removing the piece of green and white of my previous school uniform from his tight grip, I turned around from the cowering partner on the ground. 

Fingering the red ribbon on my ex-uniform, I turned to the boy who had dared to leave his partner alone to move forward into the site, "Where did you find these?" I asked him in a low tone, my temper brewing. 

The boy shivered and pointed a shaky finger towards a far-away point into the east. My legs all but ran to the somewhat detached foreboding building of pure white clay. The building remained fallen apart just like the rest of the Shiro but the magnificent artwork on its somewhat existing ceiling took my breath away and made my life fall apart just like the structure surrounding me. 

The ceiling to wall painting depicted the most beautiful scenery of a Japanese wedding, complete with wedding bells and happy vibes. The groom, a majestic white-haired, gold-eyed silver dog-demon in luxurious red silk wedding garbs and the bride...I hiccupped, trying to stop my fast watering eyes and my breaking heart- the bride wore beautifully adorned silks designed only for a grand wedding, but her eyes and her hair caught my rapt attention, they were of the purest blue and raven and I stared at the glaring reflection of a future never possible. 

I was thankful that no soul showed up when I occupied the room. If the ceiling was a dive into misery lake, then, the rest of the room was my worst nightmare and yet my most precious gift.  

Covering the farthest wall of the humble room was an ancient wardrobe, adorned with various versions of my green and white school uniform, styled and fashioned into acceptable feudal era standard clothing. I fell to my knees, no more capable of supporting my wobbly knees and the almost non-existent wooden flooring creaked under my weight. The massive collection of scrolls adorning the decaying walls fell over, near my bent knees. One, in particular, rolled towards me, flashing blinding green, giving off his signature youki. I tried to move my shaky body to snatch the rolled-up-somehow-immaculate fresh scroll. 

The red string wrapped around it was charged with his youki and a silly incantation only he could have cast. My lips murmured in disbelief, 'Sesshomaru, you jackass' and the ribbon unfurled, the scroll dropping open. I laughed in disbelief. 

The scroll was not one in number, it was a collection of neatly bound scrolls and his hand-carved calligraphy shone in the dull yet brightly lit room. The letters he had written when he was bored had finally found their way to me. They were a perfect product of him, crisp and devoid of many words, yet firm and expressive. A bit of silliness and awkwardness to the mix.

Kagome,

I feel bored...

From Sesshomaru-

--------

Kagome,

I feel bored today as well. Naraku and the battle has ended and I have nothing left to do!

From Sesshomaru-

---------

Kagome,

I don't know why I write these letters when I feel bored. But, nowadays, I have increasingly felt bored. 

From Sesshomaru-

----------

Kagome,

Today I am visiting Edo. Now, I am resting in Inuyasha's forest, near that well which used to be here. Where has that taken you? Would you have taken me there perhaps?

From Sesshomaru-

----------

Kagome,

Rin is asking for you now. What should I tell her? I don't know how to converse with a human. 

From Sesshomaru-

----------

Kagome,

The slayer and the monk have been proclaimed man and wife. Are you happy?

From Sesshomaru-

------------

Kagome,

Inuyasha is visiting my Shiro now. We do not speak nicely but now we can stay in the same room without fighting. Does this please you?

From Sesshomaru-

-------------

Kagome,

This Sesshomaru is having dreams of a joyous wedding, our wedding. Do you think I should paint them in our future chambers?

From Sesshomaru-

--------------

Kagome,

Kohaku and Rin are thinking of getting betrothed. Do you think they would make a good match?

From Sesshomaru-

-------------

Kagome,

Jaken is getting old. Today he forgot this one's scheduled meeting with a lord. I have to remember to kill him once I solve this matter. Do not worry, this Sesshomaru would fix everything!

From Sesshomaru-

------------

Kagome, 

The lord from the last meeting wants me to take his daughter as a mate. But do not worry, this Sesshomaru has refused. 

From Sesshomaru-

------------

Kagome,

Do you still have that short apparel you had worn during our first encounter? This Sesshomaru would like to see you in that one, again.

From Sesshomaru-

------------

Kagome,

The well has returned. Do you feel this Sesshomaru's presence from the other side?

From Sesshomaru-

-------------

Kagome,

This Sesshomaru has centuries to wait. I will remain to wait for your return.

From Sesshomaru-

-------------

Kagome,

Do you think we can name our future children after the fallen warriors of our family?

From Sesshomaru-

-----------

Kagome,

I have a foreboding feeling of an upcoming hour of pain. I do not know what it is. But, this might be my last letter to you. Listen carefully, I would say it only once.

You are the one I adore the most in this world. I have and would forever adore you the same.

From Your Sesshomaru!

-----------

The letters had ended up in a hurry, without conclusion and most importantly with a confession, I could have never believed the Lord would have ever made. Then, I knew, how much he had loved me. A love I had been too blind to see...No, maybe he was blinded the same. The facts, our hearts and our destinies were so close and had been so intimately intertwined in the past that we both had been fools to have noticed things too late, too sudden to have remedied our pasts and solidified our futures. 

After that, I had let the scrolls drop to the floor...

Resigning myself to the truth that we were never destined to be. 

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That room remains in my memory as I lie down on this bed, waiting for my death. I had married after that, only to placate my family if not to find love. I had lost all hopes to fall in love after I lost him. To this day, my ridiculous anger over his sacrifice had reduced somewhat, but the dull ache of incompletion remains, deep in my soul. 

I look up as soon as the door is pushed open, my son enters the hospital room. The sickly atmosphere does nothing for my health improvement, I have told him so, but he insists his mother needs a hospital bed to recover. 

"Mama, your book has been published!" he walks over to me and helps me to lean over the bed. His eyes light up with joy and his barely visible wrinkles make him look too much like his father, a nameless man in my otherwise adventurous life. 

I open the book, the last one I have published after years of research and a bad case of essay writing. 

Letters to his beloved...

The book which consists of more than five volumes spread across the time frame of the battles between Inu no Taisho and his past enemies. It continues to retell my adventures with a fairy tale spin of my own fantasy romance with a Youkai Lord. The story of a girl who started as a small teenager, braving storms and enemies mated the great lord of the west, Sesshomaru, son of Inu no Taisho. 

I never mentioned my original name here. Just a small correction, something he used to call me all the time, 'Miko'. Yes, that was the name of the girl barreling through adventures and finding a place of her own in a world otherwise filled with unfinished love stories.

I shifted slowly, handing over my last volume to my son. 

"Keep these with you and pass them down the family as an heirloom. Do you understand, Touga?"

My son nods his head once and I turn around to sleep. I feel like today would be my last day on this planet. I almost smile, I know he is waiting for me on the other side.

"Mama, this girl, is this...you?"

My son asks me suddenly, standing on the open doorway of the hospital room, ready to leave.

"...Yes!"

My son leaves and I stare at the white ceiling, trying to remember how he had looked. With my age, I had forgotten everything mostly, his attire, his boots, his hair; the only thing I still remember are those cold yet passionate glowing eyes from the first time they had locked with mine.

"Sesshomaru, let us meet in another world! I love you!"

I closed my eyes then, waiting for a long-awaited sleep to claim me, finally. 

A/n: Hey guys, there ended the sequel to the song of souls. This one I feel might not have been as sorrowful as the prequel. But, I have tried to emotionally abuse my characters as much as I could!

Let me know how you feel about it!